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Lizzie Butler – How To Make A Change, Overcome Fears And Communicate Better (#61)

How Lizzie overcame fear and anxiety and how you can too!

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Lizzie Butler - How To Make A Change, Overcome Fears And Communicate Better | The Black Country Buddhas Podcast | My Home Vitality

Introduction to guest:

Lizzie is the Founder and Creator of LB Communications – an exciting business that shares the most essential communication skills for corporate and individual development.

In this podcast, Lizzie takes us through how she transformed her life after facing her fears and running a sleep debt strategy. Lizzie shares real life stories so that you can learn how to manage and use your intrapersonal communication to achieve your success.

Weaved into her story, she addresses important issues like:

  • The signs to look for when you’re on the verge of breakdown or in need of rest.
  • How to recover from a traumatic event.
  • How she overcame fear and retrained her brain.
  • How to find your passion and purpose in life.
  • How to find the job of your dreams, and how to get that job.

There are lots of practical tips and techniques for making a change and overcoming adversity in this one, so if you’re looking to evolve or transform as a person I’m certain that you will enjoy the show.

Key quotes and takeaways from the show:

“It starts before it starts.”

Distracting yourself and “making yourself busy” is not an effective long-term strategy.

Don’t be afraid to grieve.

Give yourself permission to rest. Don’t be afraid to rest. Don’t be afraid to do nothing. “I made myself a priority.”

Learn how to listen to your brain and your body through your intrapersonal communication. Your brain is designed to protect you.

Useful techniques to prepare, relax and recover: diaphragmatic breathing, visualisation and the powerful use of appropriate self-talk.

You don’t “have” panic attacks, you “do” them. By reverse engineering the process, you can understand what you are doing that creates the result. For example, controlling your breathing. To get a different result, break the chain in the process and focus on getting a different, better outcome.

Consistency over intensity.

Laughter and fun are great brain interrupts. “I learned how to laugh again and have fun.”

On visual preparation: apply the same modalities (five senses) to the task you are about to complete as if you are remembering it actually happened, not as if you are imagining or creating. “Create a good picture.” There is a difference between remembering something (a real situation) to constructing something (an imagination). Applying your remembered modalities (five senses) to a task you’ve not yet completed will increase your confidence and help you to perform to your fullest.

Get into the state before you operate. You must keep the state. Own your space and everything/everyone in your space. Confidence breeds confidence.

“We are emotional 1st, 2nd and 3rd. We feel before we think.”

In a panel of interviewers, it is unlikely that each panel member will hold the same weight. More likely, that 1 or 2 of them will have the ultimate decision about who gets hired. Research your audience and know everything there is to know about them so that you can communicate using their preferred language style.

It’s not about you. Communication is all about them.

“Well packaged honesty.”

“A conversation is a presentation if you care enough.”

“Just give them what they need/what they’ve asked for.” Don’t second guess or try to add anything you think might be relevant… give them what they’ve asked for.

Presentations are a performance!

“As soon as your audience is aware of you, you’re influencing them.”

Influence and decisions are made before you are even aware: it’s subconscious and emotional.

Ecology check: checking the consequences of your future actions/plans and listening to your intrapersonal communication increases your chance of making the right decision.

Lizzie’s decision making-process: Does it look right? Does it sound right? Does it make me feel good?

Hierarchy of criteria: put what’s most important to you in a weighted list of criteria (most important first).

“Rest is the number 1 performance enhancer. It is critical to your success!”

Question of the day:

“Do you just focus on positive visualisations or do you consider the worst-case scenario too?”

Links to podcast sites:

Listen on iTunes
Listen on Spotify
Listen on Stitcher
Listen on Overcast

The full podcast:

Related episode:

Lizzie mentions the positive influence Chris Parker had on her life, several times during this podcast. To find out more about Chris’ brilliance, watch our discussions with him in the podcasts below.

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Show notes:

  • 00:00 – Overall show introduction.
  • 00:45 – Finding your purpose and getting things done in life – mhvpath.com.
  • 02:46 – Introduction to today’s show.
  • 05:08 – The build up to Lizzie’s breakdown.
  • 15:03 – Lizzie’s admission that she was not well and her refusal of antidepressants.
  • 20:56 – Lizzie’s approach to overcoming her problems.
  • 41:37 – Lizzie giving herself permission to rest.
  • 47:29 – Strategies for preparing and overcoming fears.
  • 01:16:21 – How Lizzie dealt with the loss of her grandma.
  • 01:19:38 – Advice for giving a presentation to a panel.
  • 01:21:15 – Influence is made before you are even aware: it’s subconscious and emotional.
  • 01:22:50 – How to decide on making a change and dealing with worst case scenarios.
  • 01:27:42 – An example of how to talk in someone else’s language.
  • 01:31:29 – The hierarchy of criteria.
  • 01:32:55 – Lizzie’s final message and how to contact her.
  • 01:34:20 – Where to find more on Chris Parker.
  • 01:35:03 – Gaz’s final words… don’t feel guilty about resting!
  • 01:36:28 – Shaun’s notes from the show.
  • 01:37:06 – A good resource for helping you make a change.
  • 01:38:01 – Next week’s guest and how to contact us.

People and resources mentioned:

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